2014 seems to be the year of change for me.
It started off with getting engaged last summer and then married this past April. Having David move in with me, and starting our lives together, counts as a pretty big change, I think!
We also decided to move closer to the town that he works in- Ware. So we started looking, and found a great flat (to rent) right on the High Street. With views towards the river, and right near the library, and pool, we quickly agreed to take it. Moving means that David won't have to bike miles and miles each day to work and back, and it also helps give us a fresh start. A place that we can call our own, that we picked out together, and doesn't feel like it belongs to one of us (as our currently flat still feels like "mine" and not "ours"). I'm excited for a new place to live and move to a town that has such a great reputation.
A while ago, I also made the decision to not return to my current school next September. David and I had talked about moving close to Ware, and through those discussions, amongst other reasons, I knew that the best option for us would be for me to leave my position at the school. For a while, I thought about doing supply and short term contracts, but another thought occurred to me: I could go back to school as a student!
For a long time, I have wanted to pursue my interest in Psychology and continue my education in that field. I love teaching, and working with young people, but it is not something that I could realistically do long term. Being on my feet, carrying boxes of books, and the other physical requirements of classroom teaching is very hard on my spine. As many of you know, I had a spinal injury whilst at university and have been left with bone, muscle, disc and nerve damage. While I can deal with this now, I cannot imagine being able to lug books around when I'm in my 40s, or 50s, when my neck will mostly likely be much worse than it is now.
Teaching anywhere is a difficult and time consuming job. Teaching in the UK, is almost an impossible job. The ever changing curriculum, constant check ups (because we aren't trusted to do our jobs), OFSTED and the way the system is set up, means that teachers here face an insane amount of pressure. In fact, one of the reasons that there are so many teaching jobs across England, and why there are so many young teachers, is because teaching here is very stressful. While I've not reached that burn-out stage yet, I don't see the point of waiting around until that happens, and staying in a profession that will likely make me miserable (and not because of the actual teaching, but because of everything else the system throws at you) doesn't make sense.
Since taking some Psychology courses in the past, I have entertained the idea of becoming either an Educational Psychologist, or working as a Counseling Psychologist. I have always fallen into the role of listener, and been the person that others confide in, so it seemed like a path that would make sense for me. By taking a MSc in Psychology, I will get the foundation that I need to specialise further and start a career in one of these fields. Within these jobs, I can still work with young people, but just in a different capacity. And, if all else fails, I can go back to teaching, or tutor part-time, to earn some extra income.
Because we were moving, and I was planning on moving jobs anyways, we figured now was the ideal time for me to go back to university to get the qualifications I need to shift careers. Getting accepted into the MSc Psychology course at the University of Herfordshire meant that I could make this dream a reality.
So while getting married, moving, leaving my job and starting a masters programme are all big life changes, they are all ones that I am extremely excited about.
Saturday 19 July 2014
Friday 4 July 2014
Why I'm a feminst.
Feminism.
The "F" word has a lot of connotations attached to it... anger, bra burning, negativity, anti-family, etc.
To me, and to most true feminists, it means equality. It doesn't mean putting females above males, or giving them more privilege. It doesn't mean that women must become career driven and forget about staying home with their family. It also doesn't mean that men lose their rights, but simply that women gain theirs to share in the power and choices that men have, historically, had.
I also believe that part of feminism is the abolition of strict gender roles. If our society picks various roles for women, and men, from past time periods and cultures and makes rules (even if they are simply de facto) for both genders, then neither gender has the freedom to act, and be, individuals. For example, I would not enjoy being a housewife. I cannot imagine having no other outside work, and instead my job being to cook and clean for my family (which... if you know me.... should come as no surprise!). Now this does not mean that I look down upon those who choose to make their home their work. In fact, I think it is one of the hardest jobs a person could have and admire those who make that choice. It is just not one that would make me happy. David, on the other hand, has told me that he would be happy to be a stay at home dad, and I know that he'd be amazing at it. In our family, if we were forced to follow "traditional" gender roles, both of us would be unhappy, as neither David or I would be doing the things that we'd like. Feminism is simply about ensuring that all humans, regardless of gender, have the freedom to make such choices.
Feminism is also about respect. I believe that no matter what gender you are, each human being should have respect for others. This means not looking at the other sex as an object there for your enjoyment. The process of objectification is wrong, regardless of who is doing it. You may enjoy looking at someone because you find them attractive and there are certainly situations in which it is appropriate to verbalize that, but objectification happens when you only care about the body, and aren't bothered about the person inside of that body. This happens when someone drools over another person because they are "hot" or focuses on one particular body part that they think looks good. By doing this, the person becomes just a thing to look at, as the body becomes removed from the whole of that person. Their personality, hopes, dreams, intelligence, and emotions are removed and only the appearance remains, as an object for others to look at.
As I said before, this can happen to any gender, and by any gender, however the majority of women in our society can tell you that that it is common for men to look at women this way. The reason why feminism is so important is because the objectification of women is something that happens far too often. I could list the many stories that I have heard, or experienced, but instead I will tell you one story. The story that prompted this post.
Recently I was teaching a group of boys, and one of them got up to look out of the window. When I told him to sit back down, his response was, "No, there is a girl with a fit ass out there and so I'm going to look at it." When I told him off and mentioned that that kind of comment is objectifying that female, the student got angry and told me that I was wrong. That girls who look good are there for him to look at. The other boys agreed and backed him up.
This is just part of the conversation that we had, and many could argue that they are just silly teenaged boys who have hormones and like girls. The problem with that is that, regardless of their age, they were still objectifying the female, and didn't see a problem with that. Not only did they view her as something nice to look at, but their attitude suggested that they have the right to act this way. Indeed, they got angry and argumentative when I suggested that there was anything wrong with their actions.
I know they are just a few teenagers, but this incident worries me. It shows that there are still young people who see women as objects that they have the right to. These same beliefs and attitudes lead to disrespecting women (after all, we are not humans but objects to be used), and sexual assault, which are problems that plague our society. If you still don't believe me that these types of comments are common, or problematic, read this.
This is why feminism is not dead. This is why so many of us believe that more work needs to be done to make all humans equal. And this is why I am proud to call myself a feminist.
Note: The discussion of gender in this post focuses on binary gender roles (male and female). This is not to discount those who might not fit into those categories, but rather to simplify the discussion and to focus on the main issue of objectification between males and females.
The "F" word has a lot of connotations attached to it... anger, bra burning, negativity, anti-family, etc.
To me, and to most true feminists, it means equality. It doesn't mean putting females above males, or giving them more privilege. It doesn't mean that women must become career driven and forget about staying home with their family. It also doesn't mean that men lose their rights, but simply that women gain theirs to share in the power and choices that men have, historically, had.
I also believe that part of feminism is the abolition of strict gender roles. If our society picks various roles for women, and men, from past time periods and cultures and makes rules (even if they are simply de facto) for both genders, then neither gender has the freedom to act, and be, individuals. For example, I would not enjoy being a housewife. I cannot imagine having no other outside work, and instead my job being to cook and clean for my family (which... if you know me.... should come as no surprise!). Now this does not mean that I look down upon those who choose to make their home their work. In fact, I think it is one of the hardest jobs a person could have and admire those who make that choice. It is just not one that would make me happy. David, on the other hand, has told me that he would be happy to be a stay at home dad, and I know that he'd be amazing at it. In our family, if we were forced to follow "traditional" gender roles, both of us would be unhappy, as neither David or I would be doing the things that we'd like. Feminism is simply about ensuring that all humans, regardless of gender, have the freedom to make such choices.
Feminism is also about respect. I believe that no matter what gender you are, each human being should have respect for others. This means not looking at the other sex as an object there for your enjoyment. The process of objectification is wrong, regardless of who is doing it. You may enjoy looking at someone because you find them attractive and there are certainly situations in which it is appropriate to verbalize that, but objectification happens when you only care about the body, and aren't bothered about the person inside of that body. This happens when someone drools over another person because they are "hot" or focuses on one particular body part that they think looks good. By doing this, the person becomes just a thing to look at, as the body becomes removed from the whole of that person. Their personality, hopes, dreams, intelligence, and emotions are removed and only the appearance remains, as an object for others to look at.
As I said before, this can happen to any gender, and by any gender, however the majority of women in our society can tell you that that it is common for men to look at women this way. The reason why feminism is so important is because the objectification of women is something that happens far too often. I could list the many stories that I have heard, or experienced, but instead I will tell you one story. The story that prompted this post.
Recently I was teaching a group of boys, and one of them got up to look out of the window. When I told him to sit back down, his response was, "No, there is a girl with a fit ass out there and so I'm going to look at it." When I told him off and mentioned that that kind of comment is objectifying that female, the student got angry and told me that I was wrong. That girls who look good are there for him to look at. The other boys agreed and backed him up.
This is just part of the conversation that we had, and many could argue that they are just silly teenaged boys who have hormones and like girls. The problem with that is that, regardless of their age, they were still objectifying the female, and didn't see a problem with that. Not only did they view her as something nice to look at, but their attitude suggested that they have the right to act this way. Indeed, they got angry and argumentative when I suggested that there was anything wrong with their actions.
I know they are just a few teenagers, but this incident worries me. It shows that there are still young people who see women as objects that they have the right to. These same beliefs and attitudes lead to disrespecting women (after all, we are not humans but objects to be used), and sexual assault, which are problems that plague our society. If you still don't believe me that these types of comments are common, or problematic, read this.
This is why feminism is not dead. This is why so many of us believe that more work needs to be done to make all humans equal. And this is why I am proud to call myself a feminist.
Note: The discussion of gender in this post focuses on binary gender roles (male and female). This is not to discount those who might not fit into those categories, but rather to simplify the discussion and to focus on the main issue of objectification between males and females.
Tuesday 1 July 2014
Why I love Canada Day
I've been living abroad for almost four years now, and every July 1st, I have the uncontrollable urge to dress in red and white, sing 'O Canada' and only listen to music from the "great white north".
What I mean to say is... I love Canada Day.
Before I lived in England, I enjoyed it. It was fun to see the fireworks, and to have the day off, but now I truly love the first day of July, and all it stands for.
It sounds obvious, but when you live in a foreign country, you become a foreigner. Even though England is, in many ways, similar to Canada, I do still feel very much that divide in cultures that continuously reminds me that I am the odd one out. I don't say this to complain, but to just state a fact. Every time someone mentions a television show that I'm not aware of, says a certain phrase that I've not heard, or even talks about football (soccer), I remember that I am from a different part of the world. Canada Day gives me the chance to (shamelessly) talk about my country and culture, and remember that there is a country in which I am not the outsider.
Living overseas has also taught me a lot about Canada, Canadian culture and what it means to be Canadian. Before moving, I never realised that other countries don't have poutine (or even cheese curds!!!), or know Canadian bands like Our Lady Peace and Blue Rodeo. I never thought that bilingual packaging, screens on windows, or 24 hour coffee shops were things that wouldn't be standard here in the UK. There are many things that I've come to understand are uniquely Canadian, and this has helped me better know what Canadian culture really is.
Although I love living in England, and there are tons of things that I enjoy about living here, I cannot help but be proud of the country that I come from. Being able to see and compare Canada to other places, has allowed me to see all the amazing things about Canada. A good health care system, excellent education system, trees, lakes, Tim Hortons, and friendly people are just a handful of things that Canada has to offer. It is certainly not perfect, and there are many ways in which the country could improve, but unarguably one of the most beautiful, and awe-inspiring nations on Earth. The land, and the people in it, are in my heart.
Because of this, I feel strongly that no matter where in the world I am, I need to celebrate the day that Canada was born. The day that pen was put to paper and my home country became a nation. It might be simple longing for the lake in the summer, or a double double on a cold winter's day, but I believe that Canada is a great country that deserves to be celebrated. The rest of the world has had an impact on shaping it, through the centuries of immigration, so now is the time that we share our culture with the rest of the world!
And that is why I, even though I live far away, will continue to celebrate the day that Canada became a country.
Happy Canada Day to all!
What I mean to say is... I love Canada Day.
Before I lived in England, I enjoyed it. It was fun to see the fireworks, and to have the day off, but now I truly love the first day of July, and all it stands for.
It sounds obvious, but when you live in a foreign country, you become a foreigner. Even though England is, in many ways, similar to Canada, I do still feel very much that divide in cultures that continuously reminds me that I am the odd one out. I don't say this to complain, but to just state a fact. Every time someone mentions a television show that I'm not aware of, says a certain phrase that I've not heard, or even talks about football (soccer), I remember that I am from a different part of the world. Canada Day gives me the chance to (shamelessly) talk about my country and culture, and remember that there is a country in which I am not the outsider.
Living overseas has also taught me a lot about Canada, Canadian culture and what it means to be Canadian. Before moving, I never realised that other countries don't have poutine (or even cheese curds!!!), or know Canadian bands like Our Lady Peace and Blue Rodeo. I never thought that bilingual packaging, screens on windows, or 24 hour coffee shops were things that wouldn't be standard here in the UK. There are many things that I've come to understand are uniquely Canadian, and this has helped me better know what Canadian culture really is.
Although I love living in England, and there are tons of things that I enjoy about living here, I cannot help but be proud of the country that I come from. Being able to see and compare Canada to other places, has allowed me to see all the amazing things about Canada. A good health care system, excellent education system, trees, lakes, Tim Hortons, and friendly people are just a handful of things that Canada has to offer. It is certainly not perfect, and there are many ways in which the country could improve, but unarguably one of the most beautiful, and awe-inspiring nations on Earth. The land, and the people in it, are in my heart.
Because of this, I feel strongly that no matter where in the world I am, I need to celebrate the day that Canada was born. The day that pen was put to paper and my home country became a nation. It might be simple longing for the lake in the summer, or a double double on a cold winter's day, but I believe that Canada is a great country that deserves to be celebrated. The rest of the world has had an impact on shaping it, through the centuries of immigration, so now is the time that we share our culture with the rest of the world!
And that is why I, even though I live far away, will continue to celebrate the day that Canada became a country.
Happy Canada Day to all!
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